An Amicable Divorce


Many client's start their first contact with me by saying they want to be amicable with their ex partner. This is an approach I support and mediation helps with.

An Amicable Divorce

One of the first things many new clients say to me is that they want an amicable divorce. They will tell me that they want a fair outcome and don’t want to take the other person for everything they’ve got. This is a good thing to hear as our law setting out what is to happen when a couple divorce is based upon fairness and balancing the needs of the parties. First priority is given to the children and their needs and we need to ensure that both parents have suitable housing for the children to live in/spend time with them in. This does not necessarily mean that both parties will be able to buy a house, it will depend upon the assets available.

Many family solicitors are dispute resolution practitioners. This means that they will talk to new clients about the options available for resolving matters. Clients should have the process options explained to them and they should be able to explore which is the best route for them. By exploring the options available the client can choose the best route forward for them and their ex partner to achieve the amiable divorce.

The main process options are as follows :

  1. DIY ie parties discussing and agreeing what they want between them
  2. Mediation
  3. Collaborative Law
  4. Arbitration
  5. Solicitor Negotiation
  6. Court Proceedings

There is not space in this blog to explain each of the above processes, that will come in later blogs. All of the process options will have the aim of the parties having a document drawn up recording the agreement they have reached, or in the case of contested court proceedings, the order a judge has made.

All potential mediation clients should be offered an individual meeting before any joint mediation sessions take place. When I hold individual meetings with new mediation clients I will always explain all the process options, not just talk about mediation. I, and the client, need to ensure that mediation is the right process for them. The more a client feels the process is right for their situation then the more they will get from it and it will help them to achieve an amicable outcome. By remaining amicable the parties recognise that although the relationship has ended that there were positives in the relationship. If they have children it enables them to continue to co-parent. It reduces stress and costs.

Mediation is an ideal option to help preserve the amicable relationship. It can be used by people who are not using solicitors to ensure they have covered everything they need to when they are trying to resolve matters directly. It can help those who want to reach an agreement but can’t quite get there. It can also be used where tensions are much higher but where the parties know they don’t want to end up in contested court proceedings. There are plenty of opportunities to be able to have an amicable divorce.

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